I really didn’t mean to start an argument – even a civil one (thankfully). But as I walked by, what I was thinking just came right out of my mouth. A young family was enjoying the park I frequently walk in and so were other families with dogs and several children on scooters and bikes. A rule of the park is that all dogs are on a leash. This family’s large dog was loose and running a long distance across the grass to retrieve the ball that was thrown over and over again. Though the dog did not bother the children riding on the sidewalks, I watched them slowdown in caution each time the dog came nearby. When I crossed paths with the owner, (and admittedly without much thought), I gently asked him why the dog wasn’t on a leash. Though I believe I asked nicely and out of concern for the others enjoying the park, the owner didn’t take it that way. I was given many reasons why it is okay for his dog to be loose. My reply was to simply remind him of the rules in place for the safety of his neighbors using the park. This dog owner stood by his decision not to use a leash. He felt he was justified; I felt he was disrespectful.
Experiencing disrespect is a good way to be reminded of what respect truly is and how crucial it is in a world that can sometimes move us too quickly to judge or act in our own interests. And though respect should be something easy for us to practice, ‘So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you,’ (Matthew 7:12) we can find ourselves searching for this grace when it may be difficult to offer – when it’s inconvenient and uncomfortable. But as children of God, we know we are called to extend the grace of respect by our example and in how we treat each other. We offer the grace of respect to one another in times of both love and conflict; to ourselves in how we care about our own well-being and spirit; to the rules when we adhere to them for the greater good; to the gift of creation and its many resources; to what is appropriate and supportive. The grace that connects all these is respect and devotion for God’s ways and for His goodness.
The grace of respect is a slight extension of the grace of awareness we reflected on last week. It is an offering of love and selflessness at all times, not just when it is easy. It is recognition of the dignity of another even when we disagree. It is honoring relationships and experiences we may not understand. How well do we express and extend the grace of respect? When do we find it most difficult?
There is a part of me that wishes I hadn’t said anything to the dog owner and just kept walking by. I doubt our conversation will change his mind. But the encounter did bring me to consider how the grace of respect is a reminder to be better. ‘Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.’ (Romans 12:10) It is an invitation to lift one another in God’s ways and in His goodness.
Next week, the grace of courage.
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